I, Stan Koretski

by Stan Koretski

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1.
As opportunities go it was a good one And we may never see it again In the dark of the night windows are mirrors And there's nowhere to hide from the rain You can do what you want, it can't hurt me Cuts and bruises will heal over time But the lies that you tell are a tale of personal hell As long as it's hurting, he's mine And you can't tell the saints from the sinners Gonna feed you or have you for dinner In her mind she's a bitch, she's a grass, she's a snitch And the ice that she's on's getting thinner Ooh, that's not love No that's not love That isn't love Ooh, hoo Ooh, that's not love No that's not love That isn't love.. You shine like a light in the darkness Growing cold and burned out by the brightness of day You pay for the rides on your big rollercoaster You secretly wish you could just walk away There's a place in your heart for the madness, yes there is Which you just couldn't leave if you tried And you know very well it feels safe in your personal hell Won't you please join me inside And just like mummy and daddy She can't tell the good from the baddy Moon and stars are aligned so she tries to be kind But she can't understand why she feels so sad Ooh, that's not love No that's not love That isn't love Ooh, hoo Ooh, that's not love No that's not love That isn't love..
2.
Woody Wilson 04:03
Oh Woody, oh Wilson, is this what you think life should be? Well you're down on your luck, years from your moments of glory You once had a dream, but that was when youth was your own You took the applause, said "Thank you, goodnight" and went home But, oh, Woody Wilson You are the man you were meant to be Yes you, Woody Wilson Doing so well in obscurity That's you, Woody Oh Woody Wilson, for years you were hiding away Yet all the proud patriots lifted you high on your day Carried on shoulders, with everyone calling your name You started out a rookie, but you won the race just the same Oh oh, Woody Wilson You are the man you were born to be Yes you, Woody Wilson Fading away in obscurity Oh Woody Wilson, you had fifty cars on your tail And so many have tried, but again and they have failed You were fearless and fastest, and you're gonna last this one out And then you went home, 'cause you just didn't know what all the fuss was about Oh, Woody Wilson You are the man you were born to be Oh, Woody Wilson Returning to glorious obscurity Oh, Woody Wilson You are the man you were born to be That's you, Woody.
3.
This is the last song you will hear And darlin' though I want you near This is the last song I will sing Although you mean much more than anything This is the last song I will sing you 'Cause this is the last one I will sing I saw you waiting for the mail Standing by the gate you looked so pale Your dark hair but light in your blue eyes As your little girl tried your shoes for size I can see the mountain road ahead of me You can see a long, long way from there Picture the scene as I fly through my windscreen But I won't taste no more stale city air To my surprise there's nothing but blue skies And I ain't coming down no more from there No no no This is the last song I will write And though I want you girl all night This is the last song I can sing you Picture the scene as I fly through my windscreen But I won't taste no more stale city air To my surprise there's nothing but blue skies And I ain't coming down no more from there This is the last song I will sing you This is the last one I will sing Picture the scene as I fly through my windscreen And I won't taste no more stale city air To my surprise there's nothing but blue skies And I ain't coming down no more from there
4.
Late Night 02:48
Late night and I should be sleeping Hinges in the doorways creaking The spider in his cobweb speaking And how am I to tell right from wrong Is it just a feeling of mine? Outside the whole world sleeps lonely Curled up with the tears dried on me These weaknesses I feel so strongly Now that you've been and gone I put the same old music on
5.
They say that the clothes that you wear Say so much about you That walk and the light in your hair They tell your story But we know love isn't a given And we put these rags on And what does good fortune disguise? Is it hell or heaven in those eyes Turn's out that life's just a cliché In every style and size The seasons come round just the same Full of trite surprises And everything's just what it seems No there's nothing hidden at all And who, who would you be If you could be anyone Don the mask of a Snapchat selfie Pretending to be twenty one The Romans had bread, they had circuses We have in-app purchases Smart watches and A.I. If you dare to look up you'll see the sky Turn's out that life's just a cliché In every style and size The seasons come round just the same Full of trite surprises And everything's just as it seems No there is nothing missing at all One day you'll open the door And right there in front of you Will be the one who wins you And then what will you do? How could I ever leave you? How could you do those things to me? On and on, love goes on everywhere We know what goes on, we know And it turns out life's just a cliché In every style and size Do the seasons go round just the same Full of trite surprises? And everything's just as it seems No there's nothing hidden at all And so we yet know the truth Or it's buried with you Free from all errors and blame Cold ashes from the flames And what kind of cat had your tongue? What weasel ate your words? Sad animals in costume They like it really, so I've heard
6.
I know all about Fips Tracey bites his nips And the blood drips drips drips drips I know all about All about Fips in the Lunacy Bar Where the Nazis and the drag queens are And the pushers, whores and guns Hiding from the rising sun Fips is a man apart Charles Bukowski with a child-like heart He's got a bow fires Cupid's darts I know all about - all about Fips I know all about Fips I can't get him off my tits He's trying to see if it fits I know all about - all about Fips in a skinny black tie Mad grin and a twitch in his eye He's making all the girls move He's suckin' in a sweet groove Look at him now Look at him now and the blood, and the blood and the blood, and the blood and the blood, and the blood and the blood, and the blood I don't know about Fips Tracey bites his nips And the blood drips drips drips drips I don't know about It's all about Fips Because it's all about Fips Because it's all about Fips It's all about Fips (flamingos)
7.
Twisted 06:03
You know too well That you can't have What you most want Well, it's not yours to take And the love you gave Was not so wrong It's just the timing Was so very bad (Somewhere, someone wants you.. ) Now that love has gone but your heart's still beating (Going boom, boom, don't you know it's over) So you love him still, what a hopeless feeling (So long, so wrong) Though you lost your way you never stopped believing (You won't say it's over) Can you walk away while the body's breathing? And the pain you had Been living with He's my old friend Yes he's well known to me I met him first On the way out Of th best party I ever had (Somewhere, someone wants you.. ) Now that love has gone but your heart's still beating (Going boom, boom, don't you know it's over) So you love him still, what a hopeless feeling (So long, so wrong) Though you lost your way you never stopped believing (You won't say it's over) Can you walk away while the body's breathing? Some distant horizon But your ship sailed for good And you know that's just the way it goes Now that love has gone but your heart's still beating (Going boom, boom, don't you know it's over) So you love him still, what a hopeless feeling (So long, so wrong) Though you lost your way you never stopped believing (You won't say it's over) Can you walk away while the body's breathing?
8.
This is what I've come to Feeling like a solemn child One minute all emotion Struck dumb by God's creation Oh well Well, do you want me? And how do you want me? Or are you just keeping me as a friend When you know I never want this to end? No I don't think you belong In traditional chains But I think I should tell you I know my life is never going to be the same So, do you want me For idle curiosity Or can I search for meaning In the spaces you leave me, leave me? Oh do you want me, want me, And how do you want me? Are you just keeping me as a friend When you know I never want this to end? So do you want me, And how do you want me, want me? Do you really want me? Are you just keeping me as a friend When you know I never want this to end?
9.
In my nightmare In my waking nightmare I saw you there He was holding you You were holding him I couldn't watch to see what you'd do, no Maybe, maybe my imagination is a vision of the real How do you feel and what is your emotion? Sweet serene, just a screen Walk in, you'll find There there, love is blind Will you want me Will you still want me? Adrift upon this endless sea No land sighting, no foot steady Oh Jesus Christ, I wouldn't want me No
10.
Uncertainty 04:00
I spent a long time missing you And now I'm want you back again Not that I want for anything Once we hit that old sack again So are you in or are you out? Uncertainty Just a lot of doubt What to keep, what to throw away And if you come back to me How long will you stay Uncertainty Does it end this way? I wanted to be the only But that doesn't make me some kind of criminal You didn't expect so much fun I couldn't stop you from being an animal So are you in or are you out? There's no certainty Just a lot of doubt What to keep, or to throw away And if you come back to me How long will you stay Uncertainty Does it end this way? I'm certainly not the perfect man But I'm over this insanity And I just want what's best for us For me and you and our humanity So are we in or are we out? There's no certainty Just a lot of doubt What to keep, or to throw away And if you come back to me How long will you stay Uncertainty Does it end this way? Does it end this way? Does it end this way?
11.
Why Deny? 04:19
Baby I gave you my love Baby, I gave it all And you still say that you want me So why, why do you try to pretend? Oh, why deny that you stand at the door And why, why do you try to pretend You'll stay for the one thing that you said would never end Oh why deny that you stand at the door? All of the things that I have Given so freely, inspired you fulfill me But truth seems to vanish so easy You lied and you're lying when you say that you want to say Oh, why deny that you stand at the door And why do you ask me to try to forgive Why don't you simply let loose and let live Oh, why deny that you stand at the door? Quit holding on I say let go and be gone And get out and chase your dreams Like nothing you did had ever gone wrong Don't weep for the future we had Baby, I saw it all And you still say that you'll be there Well it makes you look so small but I won't play the fool Oh, why deny that you stand at the door And why, why do you try to pretend You'll be the one thing thing that this life will never end Oh, why deny that you stand at the door?
12.
Summer Rain 05:00
Warm Warm summer rain Turned the water to grey And you paint blue Cloudless skies Made the sea look so pretty But it's not real It's an illusion It's just a dream And still we're taken in Once Once in your eyes I saw the future golden And you sang sweet Sweet melodies Made me feel so good looking But it's not real It's only fashion It's out of season Oh what might have been So high We flew so high In the cheap seats in economy You said I'm one of a kind Just like your other lovers Made me smile And shiver It wasn't real It was fiction A simple fantasy You hoped would entertain

about

Stan was kind of superman to me, and I'm not ashamed to say it.

When I talked to him, or rather when I listened, his confidence shone before him like a steady beacon of wisdom. He spoke calmly and resonantly, pausing only to ensure that he was being completely understood. It was one of his finer qualities, his desire that he should be perfectly understood when he chose to be, which was most of the time..

We knew he had a writing project but we had no idea until he heard "I, Stan Koretski" that Stan Koretski was an established singer and music producer. Our extraordinary neighbour was quite private. He asked me to write something about him.

He sat down one day and made a list of all the friends he had ever had - it wasn't a long list, but it still took him a whole morning to force himself to remember their names, so deep had he buried them, so carefully he had removed them from his conscious mind.

He took a sheet of old-fashioned foolscap and drew three columns, inscribing in thick black capital letters at the top: NAME - OCCASION - and there he was stuck. What term could possibly sum up the many shades of awfulness he had suffered at the hands of so-called friends? He decided to leave the column blank for now, and carried on.

NAME: John Ashton OCCASION: Recreation ground.

He paused. He needed the word before he could put down the description. Ah, that was it! He wrote DESCRIPTION in the third column, then underneath:

Told me that my brother had come looking for me, stole bicycle.

"The cur!" he cursed and fumed, "the swine! and I got blamed for losing it!"

Within days, he was writing letters to "old friends" asking forgiveness for his eccentric and sometimes difficult behaviour. He bore this embarassment nobly and with great dignity. He founded a music school and did good public works.

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released March 16, 2021

© 2021 "I, Stan Koretski"

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Stan Koretski London, UK

It had been a long time since he felt so exhausted. How could he describe the lethargy, apathy? He tried hard to force himself to do simple things, but he couldn't. It was pointless. He needed rest and his body was making sure he got rest. So for the third time that day he lay down, put his head on the pillow and closed his eyes. His internal world was intact, forbidding sleep, providing songs. ... more

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